Many people in Namibia and beyond have misconceptions about Ovahimba marriage.

 

Many people in Namibia and beyond have misconceptions about Ovahimba marriage.

The Ovahimba culture has the strongest belief in quality history, making it the only one in Africa that does not lose sight of its roots. The Ovahimba culture typically does things that will not turn people against one another in the future, but there are a few significant things that most people do not understand about the Ovahimba culture because most other people have forgotten their roots.

The Ovahimba tribe historically wedded within their own groups. They have little faith in unions with members of other tribes due to a variety of reasons, including their desire to avoid pointless arguments. As a result, they rarely wed strangers. The Ovahimba think that great leadership is a prerequisite for anyone who wants to marry their child because they do not allow their children to marry everyone because they have strong leadership. One secret that most people haven't figured out is getting married to your muramwee, or tjiramwe as most people refer to it. The Ovahimba language is a powerful language that uses names specifically, in contrast to English which can use one word to refer to three different people. For example, the word cousin does not specify what types of cousins you are referring to, and the words aunt, uncle, and so on are all called differently and have different meanings in the Ovahimba language. Because the word has been misinterpreted and the majority of the other tribes in Namibia do not place it differently because they have lost the importance of their language, they do not call things correctly, and because of Christianity, they even have through their language names.

The Ovahimba wedded their tjiramwee understanding that a disagreement between the two would not take longer because they are one and share similar ideas and cultural practices because the phrase "blood thicker than water" has a significant meaning and is a caring one. Because they value extended families and appreciate all people, I hope other tribes have seen that all Ovahimba are family. The Ovahimba wedding ceremony differs from other wedding ceremonies that evolve into western ceremonies in that it does not involve lavish spending or the slaughter of a large number of cattle because the Ovahimba do not believe in one-day food but instead care for the young couple to live a healthy life free of debt. They handed the couple the cattle to utilize when they start their new life together rather than slaughtering a lot of livestock and spending a lot of money. Parents are always monitoring the relationships between the spouses to determine if they are mistreating one another or not and to ensure that they are still able to grow as individuals on a cultural level. Because people must leave to start their new lives together, the Ovahimba wedding does not last longer than two days. If it does, it may end up costing more than expected. Additionally, because the wedding is an internal affair involving only the couple, there is no need to invite the entire community.

The Ovahimba wedding is full of interesting conversation topics.

 

The Himbacracy Philosopher: Uerimanga Tjijombo

 

Tji kuhina ouramwe kuno ‘uraranganda, (In the absence of cousins, there are neighbours.)

 

Tji kuhina ouramwe kuno ‘uraranganda, (In the absence of cousins, there are neighbours.)

Ngatjiheue Maonḓi Christopher Nyambe Katongo Tjijombo, one of my little brothers, has done a great job of analyzing the matter. He claims that because the cousin is an English word, other tribes don't distinguish between cousins. Therefore, Ngatjiheue Maonḓi Christopher Nyambe Katongo Tjijombo has come up with a good calling for those words. He said that in Otjiherero speaking, let's stick to referring to the cousins of my father's sisters and my mother's brothers as ovaramwetu (tjiramue) and that those are the only people to whom we will use that term, while the cousins of my mother’s sisters and my father’s brothers are our sisters and brothers. According to my understanding as a Himbacracy Philosopher, it would be better for us not to waste time explaining everything about our culture to everyone because, even if you can explain it to them, they still won't understand because they don't know how important it is, but our culture means a lot to us, so we shouldn't act badly because we behave in accordance with our culture. Because you have been brainwashed, the instant you lose your culture, you will begin defending western civilization. Don't lecture me on the law; everything is made legal by force in the legal system. In Western law, which is their culture, nothing is established in the law. We are an honourable tribe with a robust culture, weṱe ovandu mbaza komao omanene wa Afrika mbeya pamwe nongombe.

Sir PAPA-G and Andili a boy from Uukwambi Oshitutuma village

 Sir PAPA-G and Andili  a boy from Uukwambi Oshitutuma village

 Sir Papa-g: Andili how are you?

Andili: I'm doing fine thank you sir and you sir?

 Sir Papa-g: I'm doing very approved. 

Andili: What do you mean sir?

 Sir Papa-g: Meaning I have more ideas. 

Andili: Hahahaha sir I don't think you have more ideas than Aakwambi yaNakwedhi.

 Sir Papa-g: What are kwambi's ideas Andili?

Andili: Kwambi are best mbuku hunters in Namibia.

 Sir Papa-g: That you called an idea, mwena utale. 

Andili: sir wait, I'm not yet finished.

 Sir Papa-g: Go ahead, ame kain'enefimbo lyoe.

Andili: Do you know what is Ombuku?

 Sir Papa-g: is not omhuku mboli?  I mean a mouse.

Andili: Very good sir, yes is that one sir. Do you know, how do they use to arrest oombuku, I mean mice?

 Sir Papa-g: No, tell me.

Andili: They use a mouse trap, the best ever kwambi's idea.

 Sir Papa-g: taaa wee mboli kaikushii kaa.

Someone's idea is not your idea. Kwambi mouse trap, uukwambi tuukeme iiti kiidhuluka.

Himbacracy Philosophy

 

 

Himbacracy Philosophy

Individuals that are considered genuine attempt to match their activities with their underlying values and beliefs with the intention of discovering and acting in accordance with their true selves. When people act in ways that contradict their self-concept, they may experience negative emotions ranging from slight discomfort to intense guilt. They adhere to all Himba cultural steps and adopt cultural norms and beliefs in accordance with cultural conventions.

What Is Himbacracy Philosophy?

Simply said, himbacracy philosophy implies remaining faithful to your own personality, beliefs, culture, Himba rules, and spirit in the face of external pressure. You are truthful with yourself and others, and you accept responsibility for your faults. Himbacarcy is derived from the words Himba and cracy. Himba denotes the ovahimba people and cracy denotes rule/control. The phrase Himbacracy Philosophy was coined by the one known as himself. Himbacracy Uerimanga Tjijombo is a philosopher.

There is a dispute about whether people have an innate self that they must discover, or whether the true self is malleable and influenced by the decisions they make throughout their lives. It has proven difficult to define and measure the feature, but an ongoing study intends to identify the components of himbacracy and establish its links to self-esteem, goal achievement, coping abilities, and a variety of other psychological benefits of Himba people in Namibia.

It's not always easy to live himbacracycally. Being true to what you believe is correct sometimes involves going against the crowd. It may simply be unusual, exposing yourself to the potential of being harmed by others, and taking the more difficult path. This is a show of forgiveness and cooperation as a family; in reality, in Himba culture, most Himba is linked either by matrilineal or patrilineal descent.

On the one hand, you must accept that you will miss certain opportunities. However, in the long run, it is likely to open up a plethora of new opportunities; opportunities that would just not be available to someone who has been perceived to be shifty, conflicted, vacillating, or inauthentic.

A life of himbacarcy is also far more satisfying than disguising your genuine nature. You don't have to worry about what you said (or didn't say), how you acted, or whether you did the correct thing when you live himbacracycally. Living in himbacracy means you can implicitly trust yourself and your reasons.

There are several other benefits of being himbacracy.

Trust and respect: When you are true to yourself, you not only trust your own judgments and decisions, but others do as well. They will admire you for remaining firm in your ideals and views.

Integrity: You have integrity when you are real. You never second-guess yourself because you never hesitate to do the correct thing. Who you are, what you do, and what you believe in are all perfectly aligned.

Ability to deal with problems: When you are honest with yourself and others, you have the strength and openness to deal with problems as they arise, rather than postponing or ignoring them.

Realizing potential: You can reach your greatest potential in life if you trust yourself and do what you believe is right. Instead of allowing others to tell you what is best for you, you take charge of your life.

Confidence and self-esteem: When you are himbacracy and doing the right thing, you can trust yourself to make the right decisions. As a result, people have more self-confidence and self-esteem, are more optimistic, and are more satisfied with their lives.

Less stress: How would you feel if you spoke what you meant, kept loyal to yourself, and acted accordingly every day? Imagine how happy and confident you'd feel! Being himbacracy to yourself is considerably less stressful than pretending to be someone else.

Note:

Honesty is essential in himbacracy. There is, however, a distinction between being brutally honest and being truthful with others.

Dr. Harriet Lerner, a psychologist, distinguishes between these notions in her 1994 book "The Dance of Deception." She claims that while honesty might occasionally represent our unfettered thoughts and feelings, truth necessitates tact, timing, kindness, and understanding for the other person. We should constantly attempt to be genuine with those around us because raw honesty might be perceived as hostile, judgmental, or even arrogant by others. Our relationships and jobs might also be jeopardized by unfiltered honesty.

How do researchers define himbacracy?

The topic is still discussed today, but in 2020, philosopher Uerimanga Tjijombo created a Himbcracy Philosophy Inventory that included four crucial factors:

1. Himbacracy Self-awareness: Understanding and confidence in one's own motivations, emotions, preferences, and abilities.

2. Himbacracy Unbiased processing: Clarity in assessing your own strengths and faults, free of denial or blame.

3. Himbacracy Behavior: Behaving in ways that are consistent with your own values and needs, even if it means risking criticism or rejection.

4. Himbacracy  Relational orientation: Close connections necessitate transparency and honesty.

How does Himbacracy change over the lifespan?

The path to himbacracy is a lifelong adventure, but certain times of the year may provoke more exploration than others. Adolescents and young adults try out new friends, lovers, interests, and occupations to see what feels right for them now and in the future. People in their forties and fifties may reflect on their identity, assessing whether the decisions they've made in their careers and relationships have offered fulfillment.

How has social media influenced himbacracy?

The internet has significantly increased the capacity for self-expression. However, people's identities on social media sometimes diverge from what they consider to be their genuine selves, or who they are offline. It can be beneficial for such persons to consider whether their social media presence fully conveys their identity so that their community or audience can understand them in a way that is consistent with their genuine selves.

Does himbacracy benefit mental health?

Himbacracy is a foundation for happiness. Self-esteem, purpose, vitality, and the ability to define and achieve goals are all associated with the attribute. It's also associated with coping abilities that allow people to negotiate life's obstacles in healthy ways rather than turning to self-destructive habits like drugs or alcohol, and it may function as a buffer against the harmful consequences of loneliness.

Is himbacracy related to mindfulness?

Mindfulness is defined as being aware of one's experiences without passing judgment on them. According to research, those who score higher on himbacracy questionnaires are also more aware and emotionally sophisticated. This relationship could be bidirectional: practicing mindfulness and learning about emotional intelligence could provide people the tools they need to be more authentic, causing them to think differently and become more observant, accepting, and adaptable.

How to Be Himbacracy

Being a himbacracy requires the ability to be introspective and comprehend one's own motivations. However, accurate self-awareness can be a double-edged sword if it discloses unpleasant realities or shortcomings that one would rather not admit. However, supporters of himbacracy say that in the long run, being correct is preferable to be biased.

Being himbacracy can sometimes put a person in conflict with their greater peer group, especially if their evolving viewpoint is unpopular. However, himbacracy people would not seek acceptance from others or succumb to social pressures about what they should or should not do. Following an internal compass provides them with enough affirmation for their mental health.

It will take time to discover and develop your himbacracy personality. It is, rather, a lifetime process of discovery. To begin, take the following steps:

1. Adhere to Your Values

Living honestly means that you live according to your core values and beliefs and that your personal goals come from these. Your first step should be to determine your basic values and commit to living and working in accordance with them. You must then develop personal and professional goals that are compatible with these.

Sometimes you have to make an ethically difficult decision; knowing your underlying principles will help you do the right thing. Our article on ethical leadership will assist you in navigating these circumstances. (For further information, see our book Insight on Ethics for the Real World.)

2. Determine the Deficiency

Is there a disconnect between who you are now and who you know you could be?

Do you, for example, wear a mask while at work? Perhaps you're more abrasive than you'd like to be with your team because you believe that's how a leader gets things done. Perhaps you assume a light-hearted attitude because you don't want others to think you're boring since you take your job seriously. Or perhaps you're filled with ideas that you never share because you're worried your team will dismiss them, leaving you feeling confined and dissatisfied.

Try to find these gaps by making a list of adjectives that represent the attributes of the person you know you can be and considering how closely these reflect your real personality.

Then, choose one word from this list to begin working on - for example, perhaps you want to be more "open." Use personal goal-setting tools and make a commitment to working on this every day. Setting small goals and focusing on one trait at a time is more practical than attempting to overhaul your entire life at once.

3. Maintain Your Integrity

Developing and maintaining integrity requires guts. Begin by scrutinizing your daily decisions. You will often have an intuitive sense of what is right and wrong: your goal is to learn how to listen to that "little voice" - that sense of unease - that warns you that something is wrong. Examine each decision you make and consider which one will make you feel good about yourself the next day.

Living with integrity also entails accepting responsibility for your actions, including mistakes. Accept responsibility for your decisions and work relentlessly to correct any flaws.

4. Communicate Himbacracycally

Honest communication entails speaking what you mean but also respecting the needs and feelings of the other person. This requires emotional intelligence as well as excellent communication abilities.

It also implies that you don't play games: you speak your mind without relying on cryptic clues or other strategies to get your point across. (In our article on Transactional Analysis, you may learn more about the secret games that individuals can play and how to avoid paying for them.)

Communicating honestly also entails honouring your promises - if you offer someone your word, see it as a connection. Never make a promise you are unable to keep.

5. Avoid Making Assumptions

It's all too simple to make assumptions about other people. Try to suspend your judgments if they aren't really essential. Allow others' actions to speak for themselves, rather than taking their words at face value.

You could find that if you make an attempt to be open-minded with others, they will reciprocate.

6. Develop Your Self-Confidence

Himbacracy necessitates character strength, especially when people are pressuring you to act in a way you know is wrong. This is why you should work on improving your self-esteem. A strong sense of self and the assertiveness required to stand on your own will assist you in navigating difficult situations.

7. Control Your Emotions

When you live himbacracycally, you consider the needs of others and try to treat them with decency and respect. This includes knowing how to control your emotions in tough situations.

This is a vital facet of practicing himbacracycally since it demonstrates inner strength and respect for those around you, and it's a talent worth mastering because it will benefit you in many aspects of your life and career.

Note:

As previously stated, being authentic may entail passing up certain short-term chances. After all, it's always tempting to pitch your strongest points and, perhaps, exaggerate a little in order to land those great-looking prospects.

In actuality, there are situations when this may be advantageous. However, there will be occasions when you will fall flat on your face and ruin your reputation. In either case, you're not setting yourself up for long-term happiness.

It is usually preferable to first understand your own beliefs and genuine strengths and then work hard to identify chances where these values and strengths may truly help you succeed. (Creating a professional strategy can help with this.) You may be genuine, joyful, and successful all at the same time.

Key Points

Himbacracy is defined as living your life according to your own needs and values rather than those of society, friends, and family. Living himbacracycally has various advantages, including increased respect from others, the ability to reach your true potential, and happiness and well-being.

Developing himbacracy takes a lifetime. To get started, follow these steps:

1. Determine your values.

2. Determine who you want to be.

3. Maintain your integrity.

4. Communicate openly.

5. Avoid making assumptions.

6. Develop your self-esteem.

7. Control your emotions.

Have fun living truthfully!

How do I become a more himbacracy person?

The process of developing himbacracy is ongoing. To begin, consider your values. What changes can you make to live more in line with your values? You can observe yourself objectively (imagine you're a fly on the wall or evaluating someone else) and notice which actions and choices feel corrupt and which do not. Examining early belief systems or ingrained patterns that no longer serve you to understand the basis of current ideas can help you move forward.

What are the characteristics of himbacracy people?

Genuine people share a few characteristics. They tend to take their time developing an opinion and speaking their views, respond to internal rather than outward demands, and construct their own route to achieve their passion and purpose. They are not scared of failure and are willing to accept their flaws. They frequently have low self-esteem and are less critical of others.

What are the characteristics of inhimbacracy people?

If a person is defensive and self-deceptive, they are most likely not being honest with themselves. Inauthentic people have inaccurate conceptions of reality, want acceptance and reinforcement from others, are judgmental, do not think things through, do not learn from mistakes, and are unable to communicate emotions effectively or comprehend their own motivations.

 

Why is it hard to be himbacracy?

Being a himbacracy demands bravery. Disclosing your true self, such as voicing opposing political opinions or providing honest feedback to a loved one, may enrage others. It exposes you to rejection or treachery. Furthermore, himbacracy necessitates a significant amount of mental energy and the commitment to constantly assess your ideals, options, and actions.

Why are we drawn to genuine people?

We are drawn to real people rather than people who just agree with whatever we say or do because those who are true and honest with themselves are likewise inclined to be true and honest with us. Himbacracy is also linked to a variety of appealing characteristics, such as confidence, strength, individualism, and emotional resilience.

 

Write about your culture.

 

Write about your culture.

According to Himbacracy Philosopher, as a cultural stronghold, we have not done anything wrong, but we have failed to write our own culture. I use the word "we" since none of us so-called educated Himbas or Ovahimba have published anything about our culture to date. Otjihimba is a respected culture that is unique in Namibia. They did nothing wrong with their culture, but the world evolved too quickly. As a result, we were expected to write more about our culture.

We did not lose out on learning, we did not miss out on evolving, but we did miss out on writing, and as a result, we missed out on the opportunity to make it big. We not only missed out on the potential to make our culture recognized, but we also missed out on the ability to preserve our unique identity. The moral of this story is that if we change, we must produce books and tell stories about our culture in order to preserve it. If you don't want to write about your own culture, that's fine. However, if your views and thinking are unable to keep up with the times, you will be forgotten, and if your culture is lost, you will lose your identity as a person.

To summarize, the edge you had yesterday will be supplanted by tomorrow's trends. You don't have to do anything wrong; as long as others catch the wave and do it correctly, you can lose out and fail, and they will start writing your culture and selling it to you. Giving yourself a second opportunity means changing and improving yourself. Being forced to hang by others is akin to being rejected. Those who refuse to study and progress will eventually become obsolete and irrelevant in their own culture. They will learn the lesson the hard and costly way.

The himbacracy Philosopher

Ove mwene li towola weende

 

Ove mwene li towola weende

 

Mpikilo matya: “Kapali otjikala okutya matu li lamba, umo ha dhamuka ha thiipo omukwao noovitji, ove vala hemba okutya ovakweṋi mave lilongo osikola ,ove motya ndino kosikola kumoiko. Ovakweṋi mava undapa hi, ove motya hyoka katji undapwa namuDhimba, ovipuka mbyoka ovyo vituuthitha koṋima. Kapali otjikala okutya matu lipatele naaṋi, nthe tu thiwe koṋima. Yetheṋi ondaka ndjoka, okutya twathiwa koṋima, ove omwene li towola weende. Okanunu heha haunako, ngako uundapetha”.

 

Mpikilo (Ekundungenge)

Reasons Men Oppose Marriage

 

Reasons Men Oppose Marriage

 

As a philosopher and scholar, I would like to remind you to read whatever writing you enjoy or find objectionable. I also don't write under pressure when I'm upset. I conduct the in-depth study for both my own benefit and that of others.

In terms of who they believe wants to get married more, women report minimal gender difference: 18 percent of women say they want to get married more than their partner does, while 16 percent say the opposite is true. Men, on the other hand, have very different perspectives. Married males also have lower levels of stress and fewer ailments linked to stress. Additionally, they get better treatment when they are ill. Overall, men's lifestyles seem to be enhanced and their lives are stabilized by marriage. The team is what holds a family together.

It is a link that resembles God's selfless, unwavering, and eternal love for his children (those who by faith have accepted His sacrifice and adoption into his eternal family). Men have a 50% chance of getting married for the first time when they are 27 years old. Women are more likely than men to be married for the first time by the age of 30, at a rate of 74% versus 61%. Men desire to remain single in order to continue dating different women without feeling committed to one in particular.

He might love you very much, but he doesn't want to be in a relationship. Why isn't he prepared for a relationship, you might inquire. I am, but keep in mind that he is not you. In reality, a new study disproves the notion that marriage and family are the best and healthiest life destinations for men, demonstrating instead that single and never-married men enjoy happy, meaningful lives filled with friends, sensitivity, and resilience. What a man seeks in a spouse

Men desire a life mate who will be dependable, faithful, and trustworthy, just like women do. They want a partner who would support them, and given the high rate of divorce, it's not surprising that reliability would remain alluring. In his book His Wants/Her Needs, Willard Harvey lists the five most important needs that men in marriage have. Admiration, physical attractiveness, recreational companionship, sexual pleasure, and domestic assistance are the five demands listed above. In the context of Africa, a special my tribes Ovaherero speaking they discredit some tribes and other men as well for reasons known to us men, because of reasons we choose not to marry a long-term partner, sometimes because you had an affair with another tribe that you do not like or another whom you believe is not of your capacity. Most women are unaware that some men will put off getting married to her due to a few minor technical issues; although they may not think it is a problem, men may. Men don't lie to women because they don't want them; instead, a hormone in men causes them to cheat on them.

Most men won't show ladies since they are most envious of them. Women won't inquire about what they hear on the street, but men will. For instance, if a man finds out that his girlfriend is seeing another man, his hormones will shift and his behaviour will change. According to a recent study, if a person wants to avoid getting divorced, at least during the first five years, they should get married between the ages of 28 and 32. Most men believe they are still young to get married at that age due to a lack of responsibility.

When a man has an intense bond with a woman that he doesn't have with anybody else when he finds a partner who also serves as his best friend and who makes him feel unique and special then he will commit. According to a large body of data, women report feeling lonelier than men do at all ages and stages of life. With the exception of one special group: singles. While single males substantially outnumber single women as the loneliest category, married men just edge out married men as the loneliest group.

The following types of males should be avoided by women:

The Selfish Person. Does the man you're dating seem to be solely thinking of himself?

·         He who lies

·         A player

·         The Man Who Traipses You

·         The person who makes no effort

·         The Man Who Is Emotionally Unavailable

·         The Man in Charge

Many guys feel pressure to find the ideal partner or someone who perfectly complements them in their lives. The ongoing attempt to locate someone who is similar to them is one of the most frequent causes of why men no longer desire relationships. For a girl or women who report that their marriages are very satisfying and that they have improved heart health, healthier lifestyles, and fewer emotional issues, marriage is crucial. I was attempting to determine whether the happiest man on the planet is single or married, but I believe He continues by saying that singles who actively pursue social contacts can surpass couples in the happiness index. In spite of the fact that single persons were generally happier than married people, those who demonstrated the most social capital were happier than the typical unmarried person.

In actuality, I believe, individuals get married to establish a lifelong commitment, to give their kids a sense of security, to publicly declare their love for one another, and to gain legal status and financial stability. People get married to establish a lifelong connection, protect their children, publicly declare their love for one another, get legal status, and secure their financial future. Some people get married for show-off purposes, while others do so out of envy of others. You must pay attention to his wants and know when to give him space if you want to make your partner emotionally content. You have to be willing to take risks, be brave, and be adventurous in order to satisfy your boyfriend sexually. However, what matters most is that you are enjoying yourself while you win over your man. Women who are interested in them and not afraid to express it are attractive to guys. When speaking with a potential partner, smile, look him in the eye, and laugh along with him if you find his jokes amusing. Men want love just as deeply as women do, and things keep men in relationships. Simply said, they might not always be as transparent about it.

However, they all mostly seek friendship, connection, and chemistry. He avoids arguments and disagreements at all costs is one of the tell-tale symptoms of a weak man in a relationship. Even a light-hearted argument with a friend or his partner could make him feel uneasy and apprehensive. An ex will typically dump a weak man. As a result, he constantly worries about being dumped by his lover. Men alter after marriage for a variety of reasons. Most men become less caring and less romantic after marriage. A man must focus on a number of things after marriage, including buying a house and making his wife and kids happy. Their awareness of their obligations grows.

The growing economic options for women and the shifting roles of men and women in families may significantly influence the types of commitment dynamics I've outlined in an African true marriage, according to African belief. However, there is a strong counterweight to how much can change, and that has to do with the fact that men do not get pregnant whereas women do. As some scholars contend, it has always been vital for women to appropriately assess (and, if necessary, increase) the degrees of commitment of males given the significant personal costs of pregnancy and childbirth to women.  The equation underpinning my thesis may change as a result of the fact that women now have more options and personal resources than they did in the past, but some behavioural distinctions between men and women seem quite likely to persist due to biological limitations.

Regardless of how much gender roles may shift in the years to come, I think African marriage got it right in that when one partner lost interest in the other or passed away, something had to be done to keep the woman in the family. For instance, in ovaherero-speaking cultures, it was traditional to give a woman to a husband's brother or nephew. I believed that as other forms of relationships become more prevalent, marriage would become a stronger indicator of commitment (i.e., cohabitation). Marriage is intended to be transformative, but not all relationship transitions are. Thus, it is significant.

 

The Himbacracy Philosopher