An Unforgettable Encounter: The Tale of a Chance Meeting, Laptop Repair, and a Woman's Complex Personality

      CT

An Unforgettable Encounter: The Tale of a Chance Meeting, Laptop Repair, and a Woman's Complex Personality

In Namibia's Kunene region, there is a beautiful lady named CT who was born there. I had no prior acquaintance with this lady until twelve years ago when our paths unexpectedly crossed. At that time, neither of us knew each other. It was a chance encounter orchestrated by my friend, Mr. JDT, who also happened to be a close friend of hers. He called upon me to repair his laptop, a task I completed in Opuwo, a location approximately 700 kilometres from my workplace in Windhoek.

As I embarked on my return journey to Windhoek, I found myself on a bus belonging to my friend, Mr. TMM. During the trip, this previously unknown lady, whom I had repaired the laptop for, called out to me, accusing me of breaking her laptop. This accusation puzzled me, as I was confident in my computer skills and could not fathom how I had caused any harm. It quickly became apparent that her distress stemmed from her limited knowledge of computer usage.

In response to her pleas, I decided to halt the bus. Mr. TMM, the bus driver, inquired about the reason for the unscheduled stop. I informed him that I had forgotten something in Opuwo and needed to return. However, Mr. TMM explained that the bus company's policy did not allow for refunds on long-distance journeys, and I should have raised the issue before reaching Otjokavare. Faced with this dilemma, I reluctantly left my fare and sought alternative transportation, as the lady's insistence compelled me to assist her.

Notably, my friend Mr. JDT was not in Opuwo during this incident; he was working 100 kilometres away from the town. Upon my return to Opuwo, I inquired about the laptop's issue, only to discover that her concern was related to the arrangement of icons on her desktop. After resolving this minor issue, I resumed my journey to Windhoek, leaving the lady in a state of distress.

During my journey, I called her twice to ensure she was all right, but she was still upset. I also informed Mr. JDT of the situation, who nonchalantly remarked that as long as the laptop was functioning, there was no need to be overly concerned about her emotional state.

Subsequently, many years passed without any contact between us, and I doubt I would recognize her if we were to meet again. However, fate had other plans. One day, while walking with my younger brother near Opuwo Pep Store, I encountered a lady who asked if I was selling shoes. I happened to be carrying leather shoes and agreed, requesting her phone number to provide more information about the sale. Little did I know that she was the same lady who had caused me a detour and emotional turmoil years ago.

Our communication began, but it took me some time to recall our earlier encounter. Unfortunately, our interactions became strained, and her behaviour changed. Curious about her personality, I sought the opinions of her male friends. Mr. SMU described her as a kind and hardworking woman who preferred not to depend on men. He mentioned her preference for neatness in both herself and her partner. However, he noted that she had unrealistic expectations and a tendency to try to shape her partners to her liking, which often led to relationships ending swiftly.

Mr. JNPM emphasized her desire for progress in life and her need for a hardworking and serious partner. Mr. JDT highlighted her insecurity as her primary issue but praised her otherwise good qualities, including her abstinence from alcohol. In contrast, Mr. SJV expressed doubts about her consistency and stated that her behaviour seemed unpredictable.

Lastly, Mr. SVM reacted angrily when asked about her and strongly discouraged any association with her. He warned that their friendship had not lasted a week due to her erratic behaviour and suggested that no man should consider pursuing a relationship with her.

In summary, this lady's life has been marked by chance encounters, computer issues, and a spectrum of opinions about her personality and suitability as a partner.

The Himbacracy Philosopher

Exploring Complex Dynamics in Modern Relationships: Money, Expectations, and Faith

 

Mbangu Salas Uarije 

Exploring Complex Dynamics in Modern Relationships: Money, Expectations, and Faith

Last week, I participated in a conference call with my two friends, Mbangu Salas Omundu-Okatimbu wa Uarije and Musengua Abubakar Given Tjijeura, on a separate occasion. During this conversation, these two friends of mine posed challenging questions that I found myself unable to provide concrete answers to. Consequently, in response to my inadequate responses, they began to educate me on the topic while continuing to ask thought-provoking questions. It was amidst this exchange of questions and the subsequent lecturing that the idea of writing an article began to take shape.

The focus of our discussion revolved around women who date men with certain expectations. My friend Uarije, in particular, provided a comprehensive lecture since I had limited knowledge of the subject. Uarije explained that many women, especially those considered "civilized," often approach relationships with mixed feelings. They tend to believe that they may have an opportunity with a man without realizing that some men have numerous responsibilities and financial constraints.

In essence, Uarije emphasized that a significant portion of these women is seeking partners who possess financial stability. This means that they are primarily interested in a man's financial status. Uarije also pointed out that these women typically do not have a clear idea of what they can contribute to a relationship or what they can expect from men beyond financial support. This discussion left me with a lot to ponder, and it ultimately inspired me to explore these complex dynamics further in the article I am considering writing.

This discourse was a real eye-opener for me, prompting me to delve deeper into the intricacies of modern dating dynamics and societal expectations. It raised questions about gender roles, communication within relationships, and the impact of societal pressures on individuals' relationship choices. Consequently, this enlightening conversation served as the impetus for me to contemplate writing an article that could shed more light on these multifaceted and intriguing subjects.

Uarije has delved profoundly into the matter concerning women who identify as Christians but whose actions do not align with their professed beliefs. These individuals often present a set of rules that outwardly resemble the teachings of the Bible. However, they concurrently assert that a woman can be considered a Christian while actively seeking a financially stable man as a partner. Uarije, quite understandably, questioned the validity of such a belief system and sought to find any scriptural basis for the idea that a man must be financially stable to meet the criteria for a Christian partner.

This exploration led to a fundamental inquiry into the intersection of faith and personal values, highlighting the potential discrepancies between what one claims to believe and how one navigates the practical aspects of life, including relationships. It prompts a broader discussion about how religious convictions can inform one's choices in a partner and whether certain expectations align with the core tenets of a particular faith.

Uarije's thoughtful examination raises significant questions about the interpretation and application of religious teachings in contemporary society, ultimately inviting us to reflect on the role of faith in shaping our values and decisions.

In my capacity as a researcher, I made a deliberate choice not to approach this issue with a one-sided perspective. To gain a more comprehensive understanding, I conducted interviews with several women on the topic of money and relationships. The diverse range of responses I received shed light on the complexity of this matter.

One of the women I interviewed expressed the view that a beautiful woman should not be seen as merely an expense for men. She suggested that if a man cannot provide for a woman, he should step aside so that he can allocate his resources elsewhere. This perspective implies that financial stability plays a significant role in the dynamics of romantic relationships.

Conversely, another interviewee argued that it is natural for women to prefer men with financial means because it enables both partners to lead a more comfortable and fulfilling life together. She emphasized that this preference for financial stability should not be equated with materialism. She pointed out that throughout history, women have often been drawn to wealthier men, which can be viewed as a societal norm.

Interestingly, not all the women shared this viewpoint. One interviewee took a divergent stance, asserting that it is not appropriate for a woman to accept or reject a man solely based on his financial status. She contended that many young women, particularly university students, display behaviors akin to indirect prostitution by seeking material possessions beyond their means, sometimes exceeding what even their parents possess.

These varied perspectives highlight the multifaceted nature of the relationship between money and romantic partnerships. They underscore the importance of considering individual values, societal norms, and personal experiences in the ongoing discourse surrounding this complex issue. It is evident that people's views on the matter can vary widely, and a deeper exploration can provide valuable insights into the dynamics of modern relationships.

The Himbacracy Philosopher

 

Challenges and Considerations in Marital Choices Among the Ovadhimba Community

 

Challenges and Considerations in Marital Choices Among the Ovadhimba Community

As a researcher, I conducted personal research on the significance of culture and came to the realization that teaching about culture is of utmost importance. This realization prompted me to delve further into the narrative of my personal research. Here are several key reasons why culture is important and why preserving and celebrating one's culture is crucial:

Identity and Belonging: Culture provides a sense of belonging and identity. It connects people to their roots, helping them understand who they are, where they come from, and what their place is in the world. This connection to one's culture can instil a strong sense of pride and self-worth.

Heritage and Tradition: Culture is the repository of a society's heritage and traditions. It encompasses the accumulated wisdom, customs, rituals, and artistic expressions passed down through generations. Preserving these traditions keeps a link to the past and provides a framework for the future.

Cultural Diversity: The world is a rich tapestry of diverse cultures, each offering unique perspectives, knowledge, and ways of life. Embracing and celebrating cultural diversity fosters tolerance, understanding, and global harmony. It allows for the exchange of ideas and the enrichment of human civilization.

Art and Expression: Culture is a wellspring of artistic expression. It includes literature, music, dance, visual arts, and more. These artistic forms not only provide enjoyment and entertainment but also serve as mediums for storytelling, conveying values, and sparking creativity.

Communication and Language: Language is an integral part of culture. It is a tool for communication, and it carries with it the nuances, history, and worldview of a particular culture. Preserving one's language helps maintain cultural richness and ensures that unique knowledge and perspectives are not lost.

Cultural Heritage Preservation: Many aspects of culture, such as historical sites, artefacts, and traditional practices, are vulnerable to erosion or extinction. Protecting and preserving cultural heritage ensures that future generations can learn from the past and appreciate the achievements of their ancestors.

Social Cohesion: Culture provides a framework for social interaction and cooperation. Shared values, norms, and traditions help build strong communities and foster cooperation among members of a society. It can also serve as a source of social support during challenging times.

Innovation and Adaptation: While culture preserves tradition, it is not static. Cultures evolve and adapt over time. They can absorb new ideas and technologies while retaining their core values. This adaptability is essential for societies to thrive in a changing world.

Economic and Tourism Benefits: Cultural heritage and traditions can be significant drivers of tourism and economic development. Festivals, museums, historical sites, and traditional craftsmanship can attract visitors, boost local economies, and create jobs.

Psychological Well-being: Engaging with one's culture can have a positive impact on mental and emotional well-being. It can provide a sense of purpose, reduce feelings of isolation, and contribute to overall life satisfaction.

In summary, culture is a cornerstone of human society, shaping our identities, preserving our history, fostering diversity, and enriching our lives in countless ways. It is essential to cherish and protect our cultures, both for our own well-being and for the betterment of our global community.

While conducting my research, I had the opportunity to meet some Ovadhimba ladies. During our interaction, I engaged in a lighthearted conversation with them, inquiring why such beautiful women as themselves were not married. To my surprise, they shared with me the primary reason for their unmarried status. They explained that many men from their own tribe, who should ideally marry within the Ovadhimba community, have instead chosen to marry individuals from other tribes, particularly the Ovaherero and Aawambo tribes. The Ovadhimba ladies further expressed that these men, mostly, were marrying members of the Aawambo tribe, but unfortunately, these relationships were not taken seriously by the other tribes.

This encounter made me realize the significance of marrying within one's own tribe for economic purposes and the development of our respective tribes. When individuals marry within their own tribe, their children can more easily embrace their fathers' culture alongside their mother's culture. It is worth noting that many children initially learn their mother tongue, which underscores the importance of preserving cultural heritage.

I must emphasize that my intention is not to promote tribalism in our independent country. Instead, I believe it is crucial to acknowledge the reality and truth surrounding this matter. Marrying within one's own tribe does not preclude living in harmony with other tribes within the country. It is with this understanding that I would like to share this message with my best friend, Mr. D.K., a prominent member of the Dhimba community. I believe it is essential for him to be aware of these insights.

Himbacracy Philosopher

Traditional Marriage and Cultural Significance Among the Ovaherero People: Insights from Mr. Tjijeura

 

Traditional Marriage and Cultural Significance Among the Ovaherero People: Insights from Mr. Tjijeura

I am just an ordinary Omuhimba man with not much knowledge. I possess skills like my fellow Ovahimba people. I used to be called "Dr. of Wisdom," but I only have the wisdom of listening and transcribing what I hear. As a Himbacracy Philosopher, a term coined from Omuhimba rule based on Ovahimba principles, it concerns reality and truth. It focuses on the quality of being genuine or real, emphasizing authenticity, legitimacy, and truth, often rooted in Himba traditions. Studying the history and culture of the Ovaherero people, particularly in Kaokoland, reveals that every aspect of our culture holds deep significance. Our culture shares many customs with the broader African context, which I'd like to educate you about at another time. However, today, I want to discuss a topic Mr. Tjijeura mentioned to me two weeks ago concerning the concept of community property in the context of marriage, known in Otjiherero as "Orukupo rombapira ongara/ondumbu," meaning the marriage of the yellow paper.

I inquired about the yellow paper marriage with Mr. Tjijeura, who strongly opposes it. He also opposes the new Namibian marriage known as "Orukopo ro-theme," meaning the marriage of theme, but we will save that topic for another discussion. Mr. Tjijeura expressed his inability to grasp the significance of court marriage with an attached yellow paper from the court, as it lacks proper meaning in the context of Namibians and Africans in general. He argued that many marriages lack the blessings of our ancestors, which is why they often do not endure. In fact, just last week, approximately 100 couples filed for divorce in a single day. This illustrates that many people enter into marriages without truly comprehending the terms and conditions involved. The root of this issue, Mr. Tjijeura believes, lies in our overvaluing of Western culture to the detriment of our own.

According to Mr. Tjijeura, our ancestors' marriages were always within the village, ensuring that everyone shared the same culture, which facilitated mutual understanding. In contrast, nowadays, some people are compelled to enter into marriages that are not aligned with their culture, leading to the instability and eventual dissolution of these unions. Many women, he observed, marry for status and financial security rather than genuine love. Mr. Tjijeura's perspective is that marrying someone who does not understand their own culture or that of others is akin to a black person aspiring to become white—a fundamental disconnect.

Marriage, he emphasizes, is intrinsically linked to our ancestral roots. Failing to follow the proper procedures, including obtaining a strong blessing from the holy fire, or lacking the approval of our ancestors, renders such marriages destined to falter, in Mr. Tjijeura's view. He pointed out that not all families are suited for marriage; some individuals are naturally more inclined towards other paths. Due to their troubled history or other factors, these individuals may struggle to maintain a marriage.

In a lighter vein, Mr. Tjijeura humorously mentioned that some women, despite their mothers and grandmothers never marrying, still insist on marrying. He playfully questioned where the notion of marriage would come from if none in their family lineage had ever embraced it.

 

The Himbacracy Philosopher